Take control of your life, but not of anyone elses

I've been thinking about controlling people.

It seems that people often want to control their own life through controlling others. To me that is a person who is operating from fear. If the other persons actions are so threatening to you that you must go to elaborate means to prevent them from doing something or to force them to do something, you are really the one who is controlled by the actions of the other person. His or her actions present a threat to you, even if the threat is only imaginary. Feeling that his/her actions can harm you, you try to control and prevent the person from doing what you find to be threatening to you.

It's sort of like the man who feels that it will "kill" him , will be completely unbearable if his wife or lover dates another man. He will do any thing he can to prevent this out of fear for what it will do to him.

You can not imprison another person without becoming tied to him/her as their jailor. You'll have no freedom yourself.

Saundra Crum Akers